


Safe and Alone

by orphan_account



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Don't judge harshly, F/M, I'm new at this, POV First Person, Written strangely, pls
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-19
Updated: 2018-11-19
Packaged: 2019-08-25 11:24:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,570
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16660216
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: I hesitate before entering the bathroom, eyes on Sans' door where I had had a panic attack last night. Shaking the thoughts away (especially when those thoughts start wandering to the way Sans and I slept together), I double check that the door is locked before shedding my clothes. They could do with a wash but I don't have a second pair I can throw on instead. I turn on the shower and step under the hot (probably too hot) water and start mentally locking down my emotions. It's not the healthiest thing to do but it keeps me safe. Safe and alone behind walls of granite.





	1. Prologue

Hello. My name is Aniya Novak. I'm six years older than my younger sibling, Frisk. Neither of us are very ' _normal_ '. Frisk is selectively mute as well as gender neutral, making them the butt of a lot of jokes. On the other hand, I'm transgender and I get panic attacks when it gets too quiet. Well, transgender might be a bit of a stretch. I suppose I'm closer to a tomboy. And I'm bi- and asexual, meaning I like people romantically but couldn't give a rat's ass about sex. We're an odd pair and we often get bullied both because of our differences and because we're orphans after both our parents died in a car crash that Frisk and I barely survived. It was in this crash that Frisk completely stopped talking. Of course, they were only 2 and a half at the time so they didn't talk all that much to begin with.

Ever since Frisk and I have been bouncing around the foster care system, sometimes getting good families, sometimes getting bad families. We eventually landed in a small town at the base of Mount Ebott. We were with the Scott family, which was a very Christian family. They were very accepting of my younger sibling and I- much unlike another very Christian family we stayed with that lovingly told us we were going to burn in Hell for being us. The town wasn't too bad but it was weird being the new kids in a place where everyone knows everyone else.

We often times heard stories from the villagers about Mt Ebott. Stories about the monsters that lived with it in it, eating any who dare step foot near the peak. Frisk and I are naturally curious souls so  _of_   _course_ , we went to investigate the mountain. Calling it a mountain is honestly a bit of an overstatement. It was more of a... very large hill. After all, Frisk and I were able to scale it within one day. But then, of course, we forgot about Frisk's chronic clumsiness (is that even a thing? I mean, I have Chronic  _Laziness_  so shouldn't chronic  _clumsiness_ be a thing?). We fell into the pit at the top of the mountain and  _that_ , my dear friend, is where our story started. However,  _you_  know the beginning already, don't you? So I'll skip to the first truly terrifying time we had in the underground- Snowdin Forest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the short first chappie. I was bone tired when I wrote it but tibia honest, I think it turned out well enough to be the prologue. Also, if you think the OC has too many problems or differences- She is pretty much exactly what I am, chronic laziness and all. Only differences are our names and appearance.


	2. Chapter 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The skeleton brothers!
> 
> (Could also be known as; some friendly threatening between elder siblings)
> 
> (AKA; probably my actual reaction to the underground)

Frisk and I watch Goat-mom's white fur disappear around the corner before exchanging looks. I'm tempted to rush after her, tell her we'll be fine, but we couldn't even defend ourselves against a  _flower_. Who knows what's going to happen to us outside the Ruins- outside Goat-mom's reach. Frisk slips their hand into mine and tugs me towards the door. I send one last fleeting glance backwards before following Frisk out the door and into- a tunnel. A  _purple_ tunnel. I look around curiously as we make our way down it but there isn't anything interesting to look at. The only difference from here and a few feet back is the ever lightening purple of the walls. When I had just about given up hope of the hallway ever ending, Frisk spies the end and points it out to me. 'God _damn_ I'm blind', I think, my free hand floating up to push up glasses that weren't there anymore. I had found them, beyond repair, in the cavern just under the entrance to Mount Ebott. It sucks, especially with how terrible my vision is. I can see well enough to get around and well enough to tell the difference between people and between types of monsters (I hope) but I miss a lot of smaller stuff because I can't just  _take it in_ like I do when I have my glasses. I shake my thoughts away when we reach the door and I swing it open, pausing when, instead of grey stone, we're met with a snow-laden forest. What the hell.

"Well,  _this_ is impossible," I state cheerfully before my smile falls away, "And a bit creepy..." Frisk shivers next to me at a rush of cold air. They're only wearing their usual striped shirt, so it makes sense that they would be cold. I debate for a few seconds before stopping to strip off my hoodie. I hand it to Frisk, ignoring the cold as my body adjusts to the sudden change in temperature. I have a cold resistance, which I find  _absolutely_ wonderful. Nobody knows where I got it from since mom- my human mom -was allergic to the cold and my dad certainly didn't have my cold resistance. The downside, however, is that pretty much anything above about 60-65 is waaaayyyyy too hot for me.

"FuckthisshitI'mout!" I shout when the silence begins pressing in. I whip around but the door to the Ruins had closed at some point. "Fuck." I sigh and turn around again, letting Frisk lead me down the path. The only thing we come across is this big branch. Frisk tries to pick it up and nearly falls over when it's heavier than they expected. I try not to laugh. I fail. Frisk glowers half-heartedly and wipes their hands off on their pants. We continue walking but we don't get far before a loud crack echoes through the forest. Frisk and I whirl around and I spy the branch a few feet away, now snapped into pieces.

"Oh fuck me! Is this a horror movie or something?!" I snap irritatedly before dissolving into worry, "We're gonna die, aren't we? Frisk, Frisk, I'm  _too young to die_." Frisk gives me a look as if to say 'Really? I'm  _younger_ than you and do you see  _me_ complaining?' Their looks are very descriptive. They drag me along, uncaring about my quiet babbling. Babbling... hmm... babble's a fun word... I shake my head, trying to get back on track.

"Are there footsteps behind us or is it my imagination? It's probably my imagination, isn't it? I mean, what kind of person would  _quietly follow us and murder us and leave us dying in the cold_? I mean, really, that's not very nice of them- Frisk please help me mentally." I plead, following her lead when she stops at a bridge, "Okay! Now I  _know_ I'm not imagining the footsteps! Frisk, Frisk, it'll be ok, I'll protect you." Frisk gives me a deadpan look. I hear the footsteps stop.

"humans... don't you know how to greet a new pal? turn around and shake my hand." I exchange a glance with Frisk before sucking in a breath. We turn in unison, greeted by a short skeleton. I peer warily at his outstretching hand but Frisk doesn't appear to have any hesitations and snaps up the skeleton's hand before I can tell her not to.

_pbbbt_

"heh. the old whoopee cushion in the hand trick never fails," The skeleton says with a grin, "i'm sans the skeleton."

"That joke was  _sans_ ational." I reply drily, not really registering my own pun, "I'm Aniya and this is my younger sibling, Frisk." After introducing us, I pull Frisk back away from Sans a little. Sans' grin widens a bit, making wonder  _how in the frozen hell is a_ skull  _showing emotions?!_ Frisk tugs on my hand and I look down at her. ' _I trust him_ ,' she signs. I glance between Sans and Frisk before sighing and relaxing a little.

"i'm actually supposed to be on the lookout for humans right now but, well, i'm a lazy-bones so..." Sans trails off with a shrug, "but my brother, he's a human hunting  _fanatic_ and it would mean a lot to him if he could see an actual human so if you'll be so kind...?" I look down at Frisk, knowing she's better at discerning people's intentions than I am. She smiles and nods at Sans so I have no choice but to give my agreement as well.

"great! Just go past this (useless) hate my brother built and I'll catch up to you." Sans explains. Frisk nods and skips off but I don't move, keeping my eyes on Sans. The skeleton returns my gaze and we stay like that until I'm sure Frisk is out of hearing distance.

"Just so you know; if any,  _any_ , harm comes to Frisk... you'll live to regret the day you came into existence." I threaten, sounding braver than I felt. Sans' eye light thingies disappear for a moment and it gives him a truly creepy look but then the lights are back and he's acting like he hadn't just scared me shitless (not that I gave away that I was scared,  _am still_  scared).

"Of course not," Sans promises, "Are you their older sister?" I nod at his question, taking his answer to my threat at face value for now. I haven't seen anything (besides the creepy face) that suggests he isn't trustworthy. I nod at him again and whirl around to march back to Frisk. I catch up to them quickly- they hadn't gone very far -with Sans following after. The short skeleton suggests we hide behind a conveniently shaped lamp (Frisk) and a hotdog station that he insists is a sentry station (me) for the first meeting of Papyrus. Mostly so that we can see what Papyrus is like for ourselves instead of just blindly putting our trust is Sans. He ends being a mix of goofy, naive, and hard-working and it's obvious to me that Papyrus is the younger brother. Sans acts too overprotective (though he tries to hide it) for him to be the younger brother. Of course, Papyrus could be mentally impaired but he doesn't act like a mentally impaired kid (and I've known plenty), instead, he's more... innocent than anything. Frisk spend the next while solving Papyrus' puzzles while we move along and I follow them, talking to Sans a little but mostly staying unnaturally quiet.  _This would make a_ great  _book_ , I muse at one point, watching Papyrus' overly complicated puzzle breakdown into the simplest solution.

"They're happy," I say to Sans as our younger siblings move onto the next and presumably last puzzle. Frisk is smiling brighter than ever and Papyrus seems to be having a good time. Sans glances at me, his constant smile seeming just a bit more real.

"yeah. they are." After that enlightening conversation, Sans disappears off somewhere and I'm left alone as I follow the two youngers. Or, well,  _Frisk_ is younger but I don't know how old Papyrus would be in human or monster years (if there's even a difference). And then comes my almost panic attack as I realize that I had looked away for ten seconds and _ohmygod Papyrus and Frisk are trying to murder each other what the hell do I do_ -

And then I feel like a complete and total idiot when I find out they weren't actually going to kill each other. So, while they play fight, I fall backwards into a snow dune, making a comfy snow chair while keeping an eye on Frisk. I must have fallen asleep though because I blink and suddenly I'm lurching up from a couch, scrambling to regain my balance before ultimately falling with a 'thump' onto the floor. I groan both in pain and in embarrassment, opting to continue laying on the floor instead of getting up. Except then I _do_ shoot to my feet with a sudden flash of worry because I had _just_ been with Frisk and Papyrus and now I wasn't so _where am I and where is Frisk_?!

"woah, easy there kid," A familiar voice says. I whip around and there's Sans, smiling lazily and looking completely calm.

"Frisk-"

"is upstairs with Papyrus have a pretend date," Sans says, waving away my worry. I sigh heavily and flop back down onto the ground. Sans joins me and together we listen to the soundtrack of Papyrus' faint voice. I smile at the thought of Papyrus' and Frisk's pretend date and try to imagine what's happening based solely on whatever I can Papyrus saying.

"why do you do that?" Sans asks suddenly. I blink confusedly and look over at him like he's got four heads.

"What?" I ask elegantly. Note the sarcasm.

"tap or hum and talk out loud. You're almost always making some sort of noise." Sans explains. I blink owlishly, realizing he's right. I _am_ tapping a rhythm on the floor.

"Oh- uh... well, you see, I have this thing- condition? - _condition_ where I get panic attacks if it gets too quiet. I honestly didn't even realize I was doing. I was just subconsciously trying to prevent another panic attack." I brush my hair out of my face- something I've found I do when I get overly nervous. I don't look at Sans- I've seen enough pitying or sympathetic or annoyed or 'you-are-crazy' looks for several lifetimes. Quite a few disgusted looks as well, but those only usually come about when I tell people I'm bi- and asexual. I absently wonder what Frisk's sexuality would be considered and then I decide I don't care.

"huh. that's interesting." My breath catches at the unusual response and I risk a look over at Sans. No pity or anything just curiosity. I let out a laugh and shake my head.

"That just made my day. Thank you, Sans, for not... making a big deal out of it." I say softly, giving him a genuine. Sans smiles back (of course, he's always smiling so...).

"no problem."


	3. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lovely Bonding Time
> 
> (Alternatively; I Flippin Love Sans)
> 
> (Also Alternatively; Aniya Is An Idiot)
> 
> (Wait... I'M Aniya...)
> 
> (Great, I just called myself an idiot. But, I mean, I'm not wrong...)
> 
> ENJOY THE CHAPPIE!!

Shadows curl in the corners of the hall, casting an ominous look on the dimly lit stone. The torches flicker dangerously, as though the darkness is threatening to drown them. Shivers run up and down my spine and I wonder once again what forced me to come out at this time. I keep quiet, hyper aware of every slight sound in the hall. I make my way slowly, alert for the slightest sound of another living being. I hear heels clicking against stone and duck into a near room, sending thanks to whatever higher power is out there that the door wasn't locked. I back away from the door, holding my breath as the clicks come down the hall and to my door and then let it all out in a quiet sigh of relief when the woman continues on by.

"Aniya!" A quiet voice calls. My breath catches slightly before I realize _who_  the voice belongs to. My lips curl into a smile and I turn to face the redhead. His blue eyes gleam with excitement- an emotion probably reflected in my own dark, reddish-brown eyes.

" ~~B̶͕̈́͛i̸̩̰̾̃͝l̵̥̝̚l̵̲̈́͂~~! I thought I was going to get caught," I hiss, though my smile takes the venom from the words, "I mean, did you hear  ~~M̶͚͔̯̈̍͊̈́̕r̴̢̡̘̰̝̲̺͍͌̃͗̅̒͌̍̋s̷̢͕̱̠͔̰̰̀̃́̽̈́.̸̰͇́̋̈́̇͒͂͝ ̵͙̫̫͉̞̜̃M̷̨̗̤͓̳͍̹͐̇̈͑̄̚ç̵̘̳͉̰͔̬̦̟͑̔͘g̷̢̨͔̥̞̔̂̒̋̍͛͐̄o̷̧̢͖̤̻̦̩̦̓ą̴̛̱̱͚̙̽̚͠a̴͖̳̠̺͎̓͋̓̿̆̃͝l̸̨̬͈͎̠͙̋͆͜͝ḽ̴̢̨͎̟̺~~ just now? She was _sooo_  close to seeing me!"

"Well, you should've headed out earlier like I did."  ~~B̶͕̈́͛i̸̩̰̾̃͝l̵̥̝̚l̵̲̈́͂~~ says, sniffing distastefully, though he's smiling as well.

"Ha! And get stuck with  ~~S̶̝͕̃͐͘͜n̴̝̆̉͆̆̀̓͝͠p̷͈̝̒̏͛e̸̛̻̓̀̎͗͌͛̀~~? As if!" I snark. 

"As if he would get you in trouble. He's so biased."  ~~B̶͕̈́͛i̸̩̰̾̃͝l̵̥̝̚l̵̲̈́͂~~ sticks his tongue out, giving the door the stink-eye. I just roll my eyes at him.

"Oh, he's never really liked me but I guess you're right. He would probably give me detention though." I muse.  ~~B̶͕̈́͛i̸̩̰̾̃͝l̵̥̝̚l̵̲̈́͂~~ gives a violent shiver, probably thinking of the awful detentions that would await if we get caught by  _any_ of the teachers, not just  ~~S̸̝͖͎̫̐̐͜n̵͉̎̓̃p̷̛̯̃͌͝e̵̪͉̳̞͒̋~~ (though he would certainly be the worst).

"Alri _iiiigh_ t, let's just... go and-"  ~~B̶͕̈́͛i̸̩̰̾̃͝l̵̥̝̚l̵̲̈́͂~~ is cut off by the door, which chose that inopportune moment to rattle creepily. We share a look before I slowly walk over to the shaking and rattling door. My fingers brush the handle and the door explodes outwards. Black shadows reach into the room, grabbing me up. I scream as flashes of every bad deed, every awful mistake, rushes to the forefront my mind. And then I'm falling and it's so sudden that my screams are wrenched away from me and I'm left to plummet in deafening silence for longer than my mind can take but there's suddenly gold- gold  _flowers_. I brace myself for the impact but it isn't enough. The breath is wiped from my lungs and I'm gasping and someone's laughing and-

"Frisk?" The word is quiet and raspy but the child hears me anyway. They turn and cherry wine red glows from the shadows of their face.

"Hi... Aniya." Frisk croons sweetly. It's their voice- the voice so rarely used -but something's wrong. Frisk takes a step towards me but I push myself away, hissing at the pain each movement brings. Snow crunches beneath me but I pay it no mind, keeping my eyes on Frisk. My back hits something- a tree -but Frisk continues forward.

"N-no stay- stay there!" I snap, my hands moving along the ground to snatch up anything I could protect myself with. Frisk pauses, their face twisting in something vaguely reminiscent of sadness.

"But Ni..." Their expression changes and I see the madness in their eyes, their grin, "I can't  _kill_ you if I'm over here. Kill you like Toriel and Papyrus and Sansy..." With each name, I feel my heart- my  _SOUL_ -break a little more.

"No... no, no, no, NO, NO!" I'm screaming, I realize belatedly, as I try to deny what Frisk said.

 

I lurch up, shaking and crying. I'm on the couch, alone, in Sans' and Papyrus' living room. Alone, alone because the monster in Frisk- I cut the thought off, my breath rattling in my chest as I shake my head and stumble blindly to my feet. I let the blanket drop on the floor, more focused on the stairs. I scramble up them, nearly falling several times from my hurried pace and from the tears blurring my sight. I choke back another sob and make my way down the hall to Sans' room. When I get there I try the handle and- to my dismay -it's locked. I turn and let my back thump against the door, sliding down to the floor. I curl up, clutching at my legs as I sob into my knees. I can't bring my head up; I can't watch the shadow creep forward to consume me. But I can't close my eyes; not when behind my eyelids, there's blood on the snow and on Toriel's chair. Not when I see Frisk killing them- Sans, Toriel, Papyrus -over and over and over again until I can't manage it anymore and then Frisk'll coo at my pain and just go back to-

"aniya?" A very groggy Sans asks, "aniya!" I bring my head up, looking blearily at the skeleton stand above me.

"S-sans I-" I cut off, a sob wracking my body. Sans crouches, his hands hovering hesitantly for a moment before he's tugging gently at my arms. I calm down enough to let Sans pull me into a hug and I clutch at him, trying to assure myself that's he's here and alive and so are Papyrus and Toriel but all I can think about is Frisk killing them over and over and over-

"I'm so s-sorry," Sans tries to hush me but the words still spill out, "I- I didn't e-even try to s-stop them and- and Papyrus and you- y-you were dead a-and th-they- _Frisk killed you_ -" Sans stiffens at that and his hold tightens on me before he relaxes again.

"hey, hey, it's ok. i'm alive. pap's alive. we're all alive and ok. it's ok," Sans assures. I let out a shuddering breath. I breathe in deeply, smelling the odd mix of ketchup and cold air and something else I can't identify that I associate with Sans. I know it better than I probably should since he's been helping me get over the panic attacks I have over my concern with Frisk mixed with the unbearable quiet. During these times, Frisk and Papyrus are usually out doing whatever around Snowdin. We've been here for about a week and though Frisk has enjoyed it, I can tell she's antsy. I suck in another harsh breath when my dream comes back to me and I'm stuck between the terror of what it was about and that guilt that I even  _subconsciously_ thought that Frisk would kill someone.

"do you think you can go back to sleep?" Sans asks quietly after a minute or two. I hesitate a little before nodding. Sans moves to let me go but I grip him tighter.

"Please... Please don't leave me alone..." I hate how fragile my voice sounds- how broken and scared I must seem to Sans. I hate people seeing me during panic attacks and I hate myself during panic attacks but I know what I need; I need to have someone there. Someone I can trust to bring me back to reality. Usually, that job would go to Frisk but... 

"i won't leave," Sans promises. He hesitates before speaking again, "if you're still tired, i know i am, i... wouldn't be opposed to sharing my bed with you." I glance up at him, trying not to get my hopes up. Maybe for once since falling into Mt Ebott, I could have a dreamless sleep. I nod a bit and let Sans help me to my feet, following him into his room. A soft 'ding' comes from Sans and I draw my eyes away from the self-sustaining tornado to watch Sans use blue-colored magic to lay out his sheet and blanket on his bed. Well, his mattress. There's no bedframe so I'm not sure it can actually be called a bed. I don't mind though and it's probably more comfortable than the couch anyway. We get situated on the mattress and I grab for Sans' hand, smiling weakly when he holds mine.

"Thanks, Sans. Really, I... I don't know-" Sans hushes me, squeezing my hand minutely.

"it's no problem and we can talk more in the morning if you would like but now is time for sleep."

"Whatever you... say... lazy-bones." I let myself slip back into sleep, smiling ever so slightly.

 

I freeze, the door to the bathroom cracked open. I can see Aniya through the gap, sitting against the door to Sans' room, clearly having some sort of panic attack. I'm about to go out to help her when Sans'door opens to reveal the skeleton himself.

"aniya?" He sounds like he had just woken up, which probably isn't far from the truth. "aniya!" He rushes around to face my sister. She looks up at Sans and the skeleton sucks in a low breath, giving me a clue as to how bad it must be. Her voice comes out, so broken and full of sorrow that I can barely believe it's her voice. She doesn't get much out before she's cut off with a sob that digs into my SOUL, my heart. Sans pulls Aniya into a hug and I want to join, want to help calm the elder sister that's always been there for me but I have a feeling Sans wouldn't appreciate that.

"I'm so s-sorry," Aniya chokes out. Sans tries to hush her but she continues, "I- I didn't e-even try to s-stop them and- and Papyrus and you- y-you were dead a-and th-they- _Frisk killed you_ -" All the warmth drains from my being in an instance and my breath shudders to a stop. Sans' eyelights guttered out as he stares at me, his constant smile taking on a darker quality. I finally suck in a breath again when Sans' attention returns to Aniya. I quickly and quietly close the bathroom door, backing away from the entrance. All I hear for a few seconds is my own ragged breathing.

"What are you going to do, dear Frisk?" Chara purrs dangerously. They're sitting on the toilet, watching me with their wine red eyes.

"I- Those timelines are  _gone_ now." I say, desparately hoping I sounded more confident then I felt. Sans and Flowey remember and now Frisk is remembering- maybe what I do has more impact then I previously thought. That's... unnerving. Chara laughs softly, their eyes moving to the ceiling. It takes them a while to reply and when they move their eyes back down, they're darker.

" _Nothing_ you do is ever truly  _gone_ ," They hiss, "You didn't think you could just get away without consequences, did you? Do you think you're above the rules?-" At this point, they've slid off their perch and are advancing slowly on me, "-Are you too  _high and mighty_ to take fault for your actions?" I'm backed into a corner by Chara, unable to escape and unwilling to accept what they have to say.

"N-no! Y-you  _forced_ me! You were the one that- that  _killed_ them!" I rebuke deparately. Chara's smile falls away and I can almost feel the anger rolling off them. I know now that I've made a mistake.

" _I_ killed them?  _I_ killed them?!" Chara moves suddenly, slamming me against the wall and keeping me there with their knife ~~(their eyes are black-)~~ , "You can lie to Sans and Aniya and Papyrus and Mom but you can't lie to me. _You_ were the one who swung first. _You_ were the one who started killing.  _I_ just finished what  _you_ started." Chara growls before backing away, letting me relax a bit. The knife in their hand disappears and they draw back, the darkness in their eyes receeding until they're their normal wine red once again. I let the silence carry on while I build up my curouge to speak again.

"I'm sorry." I whisper. Chara laughs bitterly and when I blink they're gone, but their voice lingers.

"No. No you're not."

 

I wake up tangled with Sans, though it takes me a bit to realize. When I do, I turn bright red. Sometime during the night, Sans and I had shifted so that our faces are about an inch apart. My hand is still loosely held in Sans' though my free one is draped haphazardly across Sans. Our legs are tangled together in some weird way that's a bit uncomfortable. Sans' breath ghosts across my face and I twitch at the odd feeling. Sans grumbles a bit at the movement and I hold my breath, hoping that Sans wouldn't wake up. My hopes and prays are in vain as Sans' eye sockets slide open and his eye lights meet my gaze. And then, to my utter surprise, his face turns blue-  _blue_! But when I think about it, his magic is blue and monsters are made out of magic so it makes sense he would blush blue. Sorta. Sans makes an odd noise and I'm brought back from my wandering thoughts. I blink before scrambling away, Sans' doing the same in the opposite direction. We refuse to look at each other, both of us blushing our respective colors.

"do... do you want some breakfast?" Sans asks awkwardly after a moment of equally as awkward silence.

"Yeah, I haven't had any food since lunch yesterday..." I mutter. I hear Sans getting to his feet and I do the same. With a short glance out the window, I find it's still pretty early, which isn't too surprising. My internal alarm keeps me from ever sleeping more than a few hours because when I do, I feel god-awful. Like, had a month of no sleep, awful. I'm pretty sure dad was the same way. I shake my head and leave Sans' room, spotting the skeleton himself halfway down the stairs. I'm quick to catch up (ketchup, heh heh) and we head into the kitchen to undoubtedly make a monstrosity of combined cooking skills. I watch him scour the kitchen and i see so much spaghetti that I feel like I won't be able to eat spaghetti for a lifetime and it would still be too soon.

"What're you gonna make?" I ask curiously after he apparently finds whatever he was looking for. He turns toward me with a victorious grin, holding a bag of something.

"pancakes!" He says happily. I smile.

"Yum! I would help, but the only thing I know to make is steak and pork and 1, those aren't breakfast food and 2, it didn't look like you had much other than spaghetti." I open up the nearest cupboard and-yup. Unmade spaghetti. Sans snickers.

"i can see what you mean. pasta frying pan, would you?" Sans asks, pointing at the cupboard below the one I had just opened.

"No wonder your brother hates your puns," I start drily, "They're all half-baked." I hand over the pan and Sans takes it, putting it on the stove.

"roast assured, my puns are  _far_ from half-baked." Sans replies.

"No puns in the kitten." I say firmly but my grin and pun give me away.

"i commend your skillet pun, but you've challenged the mustard."

"I think I can rice to the challenge. You're  _broth_ er might not appreciate it, though."

"ha! you get a good one ever so oven."

"Stew bad I can't say the same for you..."

"well don't come frying to me when I beat you-"

"OH MY GOD, SANS." I jolt at the new voice, having been too focused on finding another kitchen-related pun to shoot back at Sans. I turn to the entrance of the kitten-  _kitchen_ to see Papyrus there with his hands on his hips.

"what is it, bro?" Sans ask innocently, glancing up from his pancake for a second to wink at me.

"YOUR AWFUL PUNS, SANS. THAT'S WHAT IT IS. YOU'RE GOING TO CORRUPT THE HUMAN!" I nearly choke when a new pun comes to me and I spit it out before Sans can reply to his brother.

"Aw, can't we oil just get along?" Papyrus' eye twitches and he turns slowly to me.

"OH. MY. GOD. I'M TOO LATE. YOU'VE ALREADY CORRUPTED HER." I snicker before forcing myself to look innocent.

"I don't know what you're talking about, Papyrus. I haven't made any puns! It's all been Sans and I told him to stop but..." Papyrus turns back and berates his brother before leaving the kitchen, saying something about warning Frisk about Sans' cooking and his puns. When he's gone, Sans gives me the stink-eye.

"so  _i_ was the only one making puns?" He asks. I smile nervously.

"Uh... mercy?" Sans scoops out a little of unused pancake batter, advancing on me slowly. I back away, moving along the wall to keep away from Sans.

”N-now Sans... let’s be reasonable...” I say nervously, shifting to head towards the abandoned pancake batter. Sans doesn’t appear to realize my plan is and continues to advance, his grin widening.

”you shoulda thought about the consequences before you threw me under the bus,” Sans says with a shrug. I bump against the counter and move my hand slowly to find the pancake batter. I find the bowl directly behind me and wait for Sans to get into reach. Thankfully, since Sans is a bit shorter than I am so his arms are shorter as well, he needs to get closer than I do. The instant he's within reach, I swing my hand at him, pancake goop and all.

I stop.

I... stop?

I don't have time to think about why I can't move because I suddenly have a face full of pancake mix (and I can move again, for whatever reason). I use my hand- the one not holding a fistful of batter -to wipe some of the stuff off my face.

"Rude." I huff, glowering at Sans. He throws a towel on my face in response. I clean my hands off and then my face before throwing the towel back at Sans He catches it by the only tiny corner without any mix on it.

"Well  _now_ I'm going to go take a shower because  _someone_ smeared pancake mix all over my face and even in my hair," I say in that posh way rich dicks do. Sans rolls his eyelights at me.

"yeah, sure, whatever. maybe next time you'll take some of the blame." We share a look before bursting into laughter. And I start planning a fantastical way to get Sans back. When our laughter starts to slow, I watch Sans fondly. And then internally snap at myself for getting attached so easily. My smile falls away and I can almost  _feel_ my wall falling back into place.

"I  _do_ need a shower, however." I murmur softly, leaving the kitchen ~~(I can feel Sans' eyelights on my back as I go)~~. I go up to the bathroom, softly patting Frisk's shoulder as I pass her on the stairs. I hesitate before entering the bathroom, eyes on Sans' door where I had had a panic attack last night. Shaking the thoughts away (especially when those thoughts start wandering to the way Sans and I slept together), I double check that the door is locked before shedding my clothes. They could do with a wash but I don't have a second pair I can throw on instead. I turn on the shower and step under the hot (probably too hot) water and start mentally locking down my emotions. It's not the healthiest thing to do but it keeps me safe. Safe and alone behind walls of granite.


End file.
